Football was my world. The roar of the crowd, the crunch of pads, the thrill of a perfectly executed play—it defined me for years. But when the cleats came off and the stadium lights dimmed, I faced a question that haunted me: Who am I without the game? In The In Crowd: Life, Legacy, Leadership, I share my journey of finding purpose beyond the gridiron, a path that led me through faith, family, and coaching. This isn’t just a story of leaving football; it’s about discovering a deeper calling that reshaped my life.
Retiring from professional football at 33 wasn’t easy. The game had given me identity, structure, and a sense of belonging. Yet, as I stepped away from the Canadian Football League (CFL) and arena football, I realized the field had prepared me for something greater. Purpose, I learned, isn’t tied to a single role—it’s a lifelong pursuit of meaning. This blog post reflects on how I found that purpose beyond the gridiron, through moments of doubt, divine guidance, and a commitment to impacting others.
Leaving the Game – A Leap into the Unknown
The decision to retire came faster than I expected. One day, I was sprinting down the field, adrenaline pumping; the next, I was staring at a future without football. In The In Crowd, I wrote, “Walking away from the game felt like losing a piece of my soul, but it also opened a door to something new.” That “something new” wasn’t clear at first. I felt unmoored, like a ship without a compass. Football had been my purpose—or so I thought.
The transition was jarring. I missed the camaraderie, the discipline, the clarity of a playbook. But I also knew I couldn’t cling to the past. I began reflecting on what the game had taught me: resilience, teamwork, and the value of preparation. These weren’t just skills for football; they were tools for life. I started asking myself, “How can I use what I’ve learned to serve others?” That question became the seed of my purpose beyond the gridiron.
I leaned on my faith during this time. Prayer gave me clarity, reminding me that my worth wasn’t tied to my stats or accolades. I began to see retirement not as an end, but as a pivot. The gridiron had been my stage, but the lessons I’d learned there could shine in new arenas. This realization pushed me to explore coaching, a role that would let me give back while staying connected to the sport I loved.
Faith and Family – Anchors of Purpose
As I navigated life after football, faith and family became my foundation. In The In Crowd, I reflect, “God’s plan for me was bigger than the game, and my family showed me how to live it.” Growing up, faith was a quiet presence in my life, but it became a lifeline in retirement. I turned to scripture and prayer, seeking direction. One verse, Jeremiah 29:11, stuck with me: “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you.” It reminded me that purpose evolves, guided by a higher power.
Family played an equally vital role. My wife and children grounded me, giving me a reason to show up every day. They weren’t impressed by my past touchdowns or tackles—they needed me present, engaged, and authentic. Balancing family life with my ambitions wasn’t always easy. I’d spent years prioritizing practice schedules over family dinners, but retirement gave me a chance to reset. I started coaching my kids’ teams, showing up for school events, and listening more than I spoke. These moments taught me that purpose isn’t always grand; sometimes, it’s in the small acts of love and presence.
My family also challenged me to redefine success. In football, success was measured by wins and stats. In life, it’s about impact—how you lift others up. I began to see my role as a husband and father as a calling, one that demanded the same discipline and heart I’d given to the game. This shift helped me find purpose beyond the gridiron, rooted in relationships rather than achievements.
Coaching – A New Field for Impact
Coaching became my bridge from player to purpose-driven leader. It wasn’t just about teaching plays; it was about shaping lives. In The In Crowd, I share, “Coaching let me pour into young athletes the way my mentors poured into me.” I’d always admired the coaches who saw me as more than a player—men who cared about my character and future. Now, I had the chance to do the same.
I started coaching high school and youth teams, focusing on kids who reminded me of my younger self—hungry, talented, but needing guidance. I didn’t just teach them how to read defenses or perfect their stance; I taught them about resilience, integrity, and preparation. One of my proudest moments was watching a shy, undersized player I coached grow into a confident leader, not just on the field but in his community. That’s when I knew coaching was my purpose beyond the gridiron.
Coaching also challenged me to lead by example. I couldn’t just talk about discipline; I had to live it. I couldn’t preach teamwork while acting solo. This accountability sharpened my own growth, forcing me to reflect on my values and actions. I began to see coaching as a ministry, a way to serve others while honoring the game that shaped me. It wasn’t about recreating my playing days—it was about creating something new, something lasting.
Building a Legacy of Service
Purpose, I’ve learned, isn’t a destination; it’s a journey of service. Retirement gave me the space to explore how I could leave a legacy beyond football stats. In The In Crowd, I write, “A true legacy isn’t what you achieve, but what you inspire in others.” For me, that meant mentoring, speaking, and sharing my story to uplift those facing their own transitions.
I started speaking at schools and community events, sharing lessons from my career and retirement. I talked about overcoming doubt, staying grounded in faith, and finding purpose in unexpected places. These moments felt like full-circle victories—more rewarding than any game-winning play. I also began mentoring young athletes, helping them navigate the pressures of sports and life. Seeing them grow reminded me why I’d fallen in love with football in the first place: it’s a platform for transformation.
My journey also taught me to embrace vulnerability. I used to think strength meant hiding struggles, but sharing my doubts and triumphs in The In Crowd showed me otherwise. Readers reached out, saying my story inspired them to find their own purpose, whether in sports, career changes, or personal growth. That feedback became fuel for my mission: to serve others by being real, relatable, and resolute.
Conclusion
Finding purpose beyond the gridiron wasn’t a straight path. It was a winding road of doubt, discovery, and devotion. Faith gave me direction, family gave me grounding, coaching gave me impact, and service gave me legacy. As I wrote in The In Crowd, “The game ends, but the lessons endure.” Football was my first love, but it was also my teacher, preparing me for a life of meaning beyond the field.
If you’re searching for your own purpose, know this: it’s not about what you’ve lost, but what you can give. Look to your values, your loved ones, and the ways you can lift others. For me, purpose emerged in the quiet moments of prayer, the laughter of my kids, and the growth of my players. It’s there for you too, waiting to be found beyond your own gridiron.
